Subj: [ffml] [MW] Another queen??
Date: 98-10-17 20:21:33 EDT
From: tojo-mojo@geocities.com (Tojo Mojo)
Reply-to: ffml@onelist.com
To: ffml@onelist.com
From: Tojo Mojo
Eagerly awaiting Mog's arrival, Tojo stood in the Room of the Horny
next to Mog's other queens. Would it be so that...? Whould he...?
~~~~1 Month Earlier~~~~
A cold wind blew through Mog's fortress. Tojo shivered. Lighning
struck outside, and the scene for your cheesy bad-thing-is-gonna-happen
was set. Throw in some eerie music, and we're set.
The prison in Mog's castle was a little less than fun. Tojo had just
found himself imprisoned here about an hour ago, after a rough trip from
the set of the Jerry Springer Show. Where were his companions now? The
staple guy, the skillet girl... Were they captured too?
Not planning on staying long, Tojo soon made plans to escape the
prison. After concentrating on magic and conferring with various
dieties, familiars, etc., he was set.
There were a few moogle guards outside of his somewhat-cliché damp and
dark cell, and he could easily overpower them with his magic. Mumbling
he cast a giant fireball at the constraining metal bars. He was
momentarily blinded.
His regained his sight. He could see that the fireball did little more
than melt some of the old mold and sperm that had accumulated on the
bars.
"Damn", Tojo muttered. The Moogle guards appearently didn't notice.
He walked forward to examine the door to his cell.
As he touched the door, it swung open.
"Huh? That's odd..."
Tojo tip toed out of his cell and finished off the two guards with a
bit of his magic. He glanced over at a desk.
"Ahh, the ever-revealing prisoner information.", Tojo said to himself.
He read the sheet.
"PRISONER- AL GORE. DON'T BOTHER LOCKING KEY. WE CAN USE THE PADLOCK
FOR MORE INTERESTING THINGS... ^.^"
"Ugh... Sick, disgusting moogles..."
"OTHER PRISONERS LOCATED DOWN BELOW. IF YOU SHOULD HAPPEN TO FIGHT A
GIANT MACANICAL DRAGON GUARD, USE LIGHTNING ON ITS WHEELS TO EFFECTIVELY
DESTROY HIM. THE EXIT IS LOCATED ON E-DECK. HEAD DOWN THE CREWMAN'S
PASSAGE ON THE RIGHT, THEN TAKE A LEFT AT THE STAIRWELL. HEAD FORWARD
UNTIL YOU COME TO THE ROOM OF THE HORNY. TURN LEFT, RIGHT, RIGHT, LEFT,
THEN HEAD FORWARD AGAIN. THREE STEPS NORTH NORTH EAST, ELEVEN STEPS TO
THE SOUTH. X MARKS THE EXIT"
"Hmm, I think I've got it.", Tojo said, "Maybe I should take the paper
just in cas- Nah. Don't need it."
Tojo headed out to find the exit...
Hours pass...
"Hmm... Left at the seamen's passage, or was it the callerman's
passage? Umm, maybe it's down here."
Tojo wandered down another passage...
More hours pass...
Tojo turned left down another passage. He had to be getting close.
"Hey, who's that? Intruder!!", a voice hollared. "Get him!!"
Tojo turned about. Guard were racing to catch him. He stumbled and
accidently knocked over a small headpiece which rolled into a nearby
room. A large bang was hear followed by a sizzling noise. The sign
above the room read "ACID AND DILDOS"...
He turned to his left. Tifa was running around a corner.
He turn- Tifa was running around a corner.
Tifa was running down a hallway.
Tifa was running.
Tifa was running.
Tifa was running.
Tojo collapsed in a puddle of drool.
The guards rushed up around him.
A (rather dignified) guard spoke, "Tricky one, eh? Mog will like to
see this one personally. I'm sure he will be most displeased to hear of
the loss of his dildo collection."
~~~~~The present~~~~~
Mog, despite his business with the war in which he is supposedly a
major player, still found time to spend with his numerous (and diverse)
queens.
Mog walked into the Room of the Horny. He was going to choose who
would "accompany" him tonight.
His eyes went from queen to queen. They settled on Tojo.
"How about you, my newest queen?"
Tojo was filled with joy. He had been selected!! This would surely be
a night to remember...
XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx
To be continued...
Space: Rescue?
Tojo
--
_____ __ __
|_ _| ____ [ ] ____ | \/ | ____ [ ] ____
| | / \ _ / \ | |\/| | / \ _ / \
| | | [] | | | | [] | | | | | | [] | | | | [] |
|_| \____/ | | \____/ |_| |_| \____/ | | \____/
_| | _| |
|___| |___|
Tojo Mojo - Ruler of the Mohorovicic Discontinuity
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
"And it's hard to go completely wtong when picking
out a PC...(unless it's a Packard Bell; see below)."
-PC Reliability and Service: Who Can You Trust?
_PC World_, Nov. 1998
"She next came upon one of the premier computer
channels, dedicated to fantasy role-playing games
and now fallen on bad times... Most of these video
games, she thought, were desperately flawed attempts
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-Carl Sagan
Contact
"The official magazine, _Nintendo Power_, is actually
published by Nintendo and is little more than a
catalog"
-Games People Play
_Brill's Content_, October 1998
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
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Date: Sat, 17 Oct 1998 19:46:25 +0000
From: Tojo Mojo
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Subject: [ffml] [MW] Another queen??