Part Seven: The Kaitlins on Jerry Springer Part Seven: The Kaitlins on Jerry Springer

Well, while Mog here is out seeking to get kinky with Sephiroth, the Dark
Lord, having failed in becoming Jaana's love slave, decides to finish what he
started by rescuing the druidess. He marches forth to the lesser Seph's
domain, where a Sept, surprised to find the dark lord's pink heart boxers in
his dresser, happily hands over the druidess' good clone.

"Balance makes the best chicks." the old proverb goes...

The Lord of Darkness takes her back to his heavily fortified citadel, where
the two Kaitlin's once again meet. Next thing you know, they're on Jerry

"Do you have an idea for our show? Would you like to be a guest? If so, then
please call 1-800-96-JERRY and tell us about it."

Jerry: Okay, for those who just tuned in we're meeting people split apart, who
meet their worst enemies. Now I'd like you to meet Kattlin.

Kattlin: Why am I here? What's going on?

Jerry: Well, maybe we should just get the the main theme. As I understand,
Kattlin, you have an evil side, calling herself Kaiotic. Here's Kaiotic!

Crowd cheers.

Kaiotic: Look you little broad, things were just fine until that buttfucker
DLE went and rescued you! Things were great, I was going to turn him over to
Mog, and I was going to be the eternal ruler of the world... but now, this
bitch shows up and ruins it all!

Kattlin: Please be quiet...

Kaiotic: Ho!<attacks Kattlin>

Kattlin: AAH! Get her away from me! Please don't hurt me! Please!

Bouncers put Kaiotic off Kattlin..

Jerry: I assume you've met.

Kaiotic: Shut, Jew Boy.

Jerry: Huh?

Kaiotic: Never mind...

Jerry: Well, you mentioned a DLE.. Here's The Dark Lord!

The crowd cheers.

DLE: What? You two haven't merged together yet?

Kaiotic: Why would I want to merge with that... thing.

Kattlin: Please just leave me be..

Jerry: Dark Lord, welcome to the show.

DLE: Hey Jerry.

Jerry: So you want these two to merge back together.

DLE: Yup.

Kaiotic: No way man.

Jerry: Oh wait! There's a guy here who wants to see you two again. Here's

The crowd boos.

The Two Kaitlins run screaming behind the bodyguards.

Ciolli: Lovely welcome.. Ah well.<leaves>

DLE: Ah, screw this. Hey, you, the fat guy. Would you hold Kattlin there.
That's good. Now...<picks up Kaiotic and throws her at Kattlin>

The crowds cheers.

But suddenly there's only one Kaitlin.

Kaitlin: Hey! I'm me again!

The crowd cheers. They walk off.

When the Dark Lord gets home, he finds a memo from his Mystic scouts that Mog
is planning on nabbing Sephiroth as his new play toy...if Jaana won't get involved, he plans to
handle things, HIS way.