Subj: [ffml] [MW] Raven gets it on... Date: 99-02-18 19:40:55 EST From: "Nick Kertesz" Raven stumbled down onto the ground and started retching at the sight of the bloody body. The fluffie was torn and burnt by some giant bird. Poor fluffy, Raven whispered under his breath. Before him lay a mighty field with corpses strewn around it. A giant blanket of white sorrounded a small town and was even now throwing itself onto it. Raven could see how in some places they were almost inside; but in others, well, the sight of beserked fluffies slaughtering each other was disturbing, to say the least. Raven drew some branched over and covered the fluffies body. He slouched to his feet, leaning up against a tree and managed to draw his dented, rusty sword. He could see the Fluffy leader's pavilion ahead and set off for it. It seemed like they needed the help of a great warrior like himself so he managed to stumble to the battered tent. Besides, it looked like the Magi were fighting dirty anyways. By the time Raven reached to the tent the battle was over and the fluffies were withdrawing, battered, bloody and much fewer in number. Now they sat at their fires, no doubt waiting until there next attempt. Raven noticed two shadows rolling and tumbling in a tent beside him and pondered about it for a moment. The two seemed to be going at it "doggy style" and Raven wondered why the two fluffies looked alike, then dismissing the thought as simple bioligy. Raven drew a deep breath, gave a last fart and stepped into the commanders tent. "Here goes nothing" Subj: [ffml] [MW] Raven's draft Date: 99-02-22 23:47:16 EST From: "Nick Kertesz" Raven through aside the tent flap and came face to crotch with a mushroom. The shroom was dressed up in gneerals clothing and badges yet seemed to take itself very seriously. "Greetings commander of the fluffie army! It seems you are beleaguered against the foul city on the hill there! Perhaps you could need the services of such a great warrior like myself?" Subj: [ffml] [MW] Enter the Invincible! Date: 99-02-28 16:49:06 EST From: Patrick Szostak General Pat (who is a human, by the way) is in his super-deluxe-general-tent, speaking to some Moogle footsoldiers. {Pat}: Now, what I find is useful when coming out of the "spin step" is to do a little move like this, you know, to keep it from seeming choreographed. {Moogle}: But what if you lose your balance? {Pat}: Then flail around like a madman. That's the beauty of the Pat Shuffle/Victory Dance. Now, I-- Shitake enters the tent with a somewhat dirty looking man who appears to have been traveling for a while. {Shitake}: General Pat! Here's that Raven fellow you wanted to see. {Pat}: Oh! How spiffy! Alright, you guys practice on your own, and all be with you in a minute! Hello, Mr. Raven! {Raven}: Hey! *burp* Aaah.... {Pat}: How can I help you? {Raven}: Well, *hic*, I saw that wizard guy toasting your poor little army of fluffies and mushrooms, and I thought I'd lend you a hand. {Pat}: Yay! We can always use new recruits! As a matter of fact, we'll be launching a major offensive against Mysidia this afternoon, as soon as my secret weapon arrives from Matango. {Raven}: "Secret weapon", eh? Interesting.... Later that afternoon, Pat, Raven, and the Magical Moogles and Mushrooms of Mystery and Magic have all lined up outside the walls of Mysidia. A few Moogles have tried climbing the walls again, and this time the magicians stopped them by throwing garbage at them, but most of the army seems to be waiting for something. {Pat}: (with megaphone) This is your last chance, Mr. Magicianpants! Surrender now! {Elder of Mysidia}: Never! {Pat}: Alright then...prepare to--oh! Truffle's here! As Pat and the Elder spoke, the rest of the army turned to watch Pat's airship, the Invincible, fly towards Mysidia. When it got close enough, the voice of Truffle, one of Pat's advisors, filled the air. {Truffle}: Halloooooo! {Pat}: Truffle! Nice to see you again! {Truffle}: It's good to join in on the fun! I take it that this is the city that's being stubborn? {Pat}: Yup. How about firin' off the ol' cannon? {Truffle}: You got it! A cannon is fired at the walls of Mysidia, and the cannonball breaks a large whole through it. As soon as the dust clears, the Moogles and Mushrooms rush through the whole and into the city, and the magicians all cry "Dammit!" {Pat}: Hey! No raping the villagers! Hey! I'm talking to you guys! The Moogles are momentarily irritated by this, but their usual horniness overcomes their desire to rape villagers, so they settle for raping each other instead. Amidst the wild jungle sex, Pat, Raven, and Pat's advisors walk towards the center of the village, where the Elder watches in dismay. {Pat}: Told ya! {Elder}: Oh, shoot! {Raven}: That was pretty cool. So, what are we gonna do now? {Truffle} Unfortunately, the Invincible is almost out of fuel, so I'll have to return it to Matango. That's the only place we know of where we can get airship fuel. {Pat}: That's a shame. But we can still kick ass with just our army! Especially when we learn nifty magic spells! {Elder}: (casting a spell) Calling all heroes across the globe! General Pat's reign of terror has begun. He has captured the city of Mysidia and hopes to extend his reach elsewhere! He must be stopped! He-- {Pat}: Hey! Elder, you'd better not be casting any spells that will warn all those heroes out there to my dastardly schemes! Hey! Did you hear me?! I said-- {Biff}: I'm prettys sure that that's *exactly* what he's doing. {Pat}: Huh?! Well, make him stop! Hey, you! I said stop! Once the Elder finishes his spell, Pat and his army kick back in Mysidia, learning magic from the big honkin' library of magic books in the Elder's house. **********Brave Fencer Pat**********